Children
a talk given by Debra Woods,
Sacrament Meeting, Casselberry Ward, Lake Mary Florida Stake - August 20, 1995
Moses 1:39 For behold, this is my work and my glory - to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.
God is an organizer. He takes unorganized matter and energy and organizes it into glorious purposeful things. The ultimate and most intricate and most risky work he does, is to take unorganized, undeveloped intelligence and give it form, organizing it into it's highest shape which is man. All other forms have their purpose in supporting and facilitating the development of man. Every intelligence is organized into it's appropriate form - with man at the top. Within this top classification are many levels or degrees. A full 1/3 of God's spiritual offspring felt the plan of salvation was too risky. Most of them probably doubted their own ability to succeed at the plan. They opted for Satan's "no-risk" plan, and with him were cast out of heaven for rebellion, never to receive a physical body, never to move to the next level of development. Out of the 2/3 who did not rebel, there is certainly a wide disparity of degrees and levels.
But we will all receive a physical body, which is the reward for not rebelling and keeping our first estate. All will be resurrected into immortality. But we will be organized into levels that are appropriate for us. And not everyone will reach that ultimate, eternal glory Father wants for us. We are not all the same. We do not all have the same potential. But free agency allows each of us to achieve our full potential or not to, whatever it may be. God will not force us. How we performed in pre-mortal life and how we manage mortality will determine how we will spend eternity.
We are all the spiritual offspring of the same Heavenly Father making us literally spiritual brothers and sisters. All people who have ever lived or ever will live on this earth are one spiritual family, and not just spiritual, the prophet Mormon describes us in Mormon chapter 3 verse 20, "every soul who belongs to the whole family of Adam." We therefore are not only spiritually related, we are physically related, tracing all our genetic roots back to Father Adam and Mother Eve, our mutual grandparents.
It is this whole family that is linked together in a great mesh. Each generation forming a chain. Each individual forming a link. Bonded together is how we must progress - if we will progress. Moses 5:9 "And in that day the Holy Ghost fell upon Adam, which beareth record of the Father and the son, saying, I am the Only Begotten of the Father from the beginning, henceforth and forever, that as thou hast fallen thou mayest be redeemed, and all mankind, even as many as will." So we must concern ourselves not only with our individual will to be redeemed, not only with our immediate family, not only with this generation. But with all generations, past, present, and future. As Joseph Smith taught us in D&C 128:18
Now, I want to talk today about children and childhood and how it functions in this great plan. One of our favorite scriptures concerning the restored gospel is Malachi 4:5-6,
Childhood is the period of mortality preceding independent maturity. Phase I is birth to eight, or the age of accountability, or the age when we begin to become accountable for our own actions. Phase II is eight to 16 or 18 when we reach our full stature and become fully accountable and capable of independent self-support, decision making, and take upon ourselves adult responsibilities.
God did not have to make childhood last so long. What other species takes 18 years to reach full maturity? Certainly not bacteria. Not cockroaches. Not dogs or cats. Not cows or monkeys, or elephants or whales.
God did not have to make babies so completely dependent on their parents. Besides the instinct to suck and cry, babies have very little controlled movement. If you have ever watched baby animals it is remarkable to us how they seem to know what to do from birth. These lower life forms have much greater abilities and develop much faster than humans. It didn't have to be so. God could have given us great instinctive powers and accelerated human development. Horses are standing within 10 minutes, and wobbily running along next to Mama within hours after birth. They find their own way to food. They are weaned, and eating just as their parents by 6 months, and are full grown by 4 years old. If they live to 30, they have spent only about one eighth of their life as children. Whales depend on mother for food for about 6 months but live to be 100 years old. Bears and tigers care for their young for 2 years. Baby gorillas remain with mother for three years and have babies by age 12.
It is clear that people have so much more to learn and are given free agency which requires great powers of judgement that must be developed over an extended period of time. But there is greater purpose than this for our long childhood of dependence. It has to do with familial bonds.
In a spiritual sense, little children are guiltless before God. According to Moses 6:54. Every child begins life on this earth "whole from the foundation of the world." In their total innocence and dependence they are sent to parents who must care for their every need. Do you know what this does to the relationship between parent and child? I submit to you that there is no other act in the human experience that bonds people together than to be responsible for one another, to serve one another, to be dependent on one another. And their is no other responsibility so complete as that of parent. It cannot be put off. It cannot be turned over to someone else. It cannot be abandoned. You can't just change your mind and quit. You can't get a transfer. You're never released. You cannot declare bankruptcy and relieve yourself of the responsibility. You can try. But in the sight of God, it is your responsibility and in your heart you will always know it. And the child who depends on you for everything, will love you so profoundly and completely, that no other relationship in their life will take the place of the love of a child for their parent, and the need for parental approval and love. We don't have to even like our parents. We never stop needing our parents. You know what I mean.
It is this dependence and subsequent sense of responsibility that has the greatest bonding power between parents and children. Not their cuteness, not their cleverness. Not even their resemblance to their parents, but their dependence most of all. The other things are helpful and nice, but not powerful. I remember a friend of mine who took his little girl to audition for the play Annie a number of years ago. He was rather a dry personality, and seemed disinterested in the whole proceeding. But when his little girl got up on stage, he sat on the edge of his seat and leaned forward and became very intense as if he were feeling everything she was going through himself only multiplied by ten. Parents, you know what I am talking about. If you have ever been to a little league ball game, who is it that gets the most intense about the officiating - and blunders and triumphs? I couldn't bear to sit in the stands when my boys were playing ball. It was far too emotional an experience for me.
What I am trying to get at is that the experience of caring for children is mutually essential for both parties. And God made it that way so we would be bonded together.
Because it is essential for children to be dependent on others while they are young, Father gave them a special innocence. The Lord tells us in D&C 29:47, "But behold, I say unto you, that little children are redeemed from the foundation of the world through mine Only Begotten; Wherefore, they cannot sin, for power is not given unto Satan to tempt little children, until they begin to become accountable before me."
Isn't that incredible? Since children are dependent on the adults in their life, they are protected from Satan. He has no power to tempt them. They cannot sin, they have no need of repentance and baptism, and they are specially beloved of the Lord, as we read in Moroni 8:17 . . . "And I am filled with charity which is everlasting love; wherefore, all children are alike unto me; wherefore, I love little children with a perfect love; and they are all alike and partakers of salvation." And again in Mosiah 8, "For behold that all little children are alive in Christ" "for they are all alive in him because of his mercy."
Listen . . . to understand the great cause of this drawn out childhood dependency. If we read on in D&C 29 after learning that Satan has no power to tempt little children, the Lord explains why . . . "For it is given unto them even as I will, according to mine own pleasure, that great things may be required at the hand of their fathers."
That great things may be required at the hand of their fathers. There is no greater school than parenthood. Our children may depend on us to provide them with all their physical, and emotional needs, and to train them and teach them and guide them and shape them while they are pliable and moldable and easily taught as described in Mosiah 3:19 we must become "as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon [us], even as a child doth submit to his father."
But we depend on them to train us to become eternal beings. To become even as our Father in Heaven is. To school us in God-like characteristics such as charity, patience, selflessness, creativity, responsibility, and eternal perspective. Nothing else will train us as well. So if the great work and glory of God is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, then second only to the atonement and resurrection of Christ comes bearing and caring for our children.
Children will not know what they are not taught. We must teach them. Whether we do or not will impact them for the rest of their lives. Though they cannot be tempted by Satan directly, they can be victimized by Satan's influence on adults. And in their innocent state, this influence can alter them for the rest of mortality and perhaps beyond. For this reason we are commanded to take our responsibility seriously and many scriptures outline our conduct as parents in regards to these children. This warning he also gives in Mark 9:42 "And whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believes in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea."
You see why child abuse is the saddest of crimes. Is there punishment severe enough for it? The earthly courts may fail to execute justice, but Father in Heaven will not.
I want to thank my parents for the happy and secure childhood they provided for me at no small sacrifice to them. I know that this has been the basis for my strength as an adult through many difficult trials. Consider the role you have played in the lives of children. Your own and as friends, teachers, leaders, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and count every instance as an opportunity. They are children all those years for our benefit. We must not begrudge the time they require. It is a sacrifice that will sanctify us. Anything we might otherwise gain when we turn our backs on children will amount to very little at the judgement bar, in fact it will witness against us, and what's more, it will rob us of the education we came here to gain, as well as so much joy we cannot measure it. As long as it lasts, relatively speaking, childhood is really very fleeting and seems to have rushed past when they are suddenly grown and no longer so easily taught, innocent, and full of unquestioning faith.
As a single parent who has agonized over the effects of divorce on her children, and who has faced the threat of losing her children in a custody battle, I have a very altered perspective. I am grateful for the lessons these trials have taught me. I am grateful to have been forced to look inside myself and make changes and find out what I'm really made of. And I am grateful for all the help I have received from Father in Heaven, my mother, our friends, their teachers and leaders and the church, in this great mission of motherhood.
I am grateful for the Primary organization and the wonderful opportunity it has provided me to serve. I have been a primary chorister or nursery leader about a dozen times in the last 16 years. Do you know what training I have received and continue to receive as the Lord sweetly refines me through these precious callings? He has been very patient with me, for I have been slow to learn. I always thought of what I was giving Primary. I was quite oblivious to what Primary was giving me.
Now, remember the links, the welded chain and mesh net I mentioned earlier. God protects children and holds them specially precious for the role they play in welding these links together. Our own childhood binds us to the generations past, our children to the generations yet to come. That we may together stand before our Lord and fulfill our purpose in coming to this earth as the family of man and enter into his presence for eternity, is my prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.